Could writing be a way of coming to terms with loss? Reflecting on my recent need to conjure a past ‘love’, in this case an actor: ‘M’ who I met through my recovery meetings, a friend of mine — P — happened to read this blog and sent me an email about her thoughts onContinue reading “Writing is What it is”
Tag Archives: love
Remembering Mum
I’ve been focussing my attention on loving memories of my mum the past couple of weeks. Happy memories. I want to honour the good in her. Since I’ve been in therapy (years and years) I’ve had to get real about my childhood, and that brought up a lot of anger. And then, in addition toContinue reading “Remembering Mum”
Forgiving Mum
One reason that I have not been sitting down to type out my daily confessions here is that I’ve been avoiding the main topic my psyche at present: my mum. My take on forgiveness has always been a bit spiky. I felt/was massively betrayed by my mum in my 20’s. I won’t go into itContinue reading “Forgiving Mum”
Serenity Prayer
Serenity Prayer I went to an online 12 step meeting earlier. There were a lot of newcomers, so for me it was a good meeting. I enjoy listening to newcomers talk because I sense an authenticity and lack of polish that people who are later in recovery lose. That said, I try and think aboutContinue reading “Serenity Prayer”
My Mother the Comforter
I’m still watching the Walter Presents TV program Rider in the Storm. It’s a pretty intense series. Last night it was very sad, as one of the main characters took his own life. He walked in front of a lorry as he was depressed and psychotic. His death cast a very large shadow over theContinue reading “My Mother the Comforter”
Dogs
Dogs I am utterly besotted — with a Labrador and a Corgi called Archibald and Augustine. The couple take pride of place on the screensaver of my iPhone and every time I look at their expectant faces and coats of ginger and cream fluff my heart soars with happiness. I smile into my phone likeContinue reading “Dogs”
The Invisible Man
I was thinking today, as I sat down to write, that I’ve undertaken a creative project in the past that was quite good practice for writing a blog. I called it: Love Letters to the Invisible Man. When I got sober in 2003 I was pretty lonely. My marriage had fallen apart (I married onContinue reading “The Invisible Man”
On Being Valued
As I said to a friend earlier today, in an email, “I’ve had a very trying weekend.” I couldn’t even really write about it, except in an elliptical way — I used the analogy of escaping my family being like escaping 9/11. Probably, to someone who has escaped 9/11, my comparison would be an affront.Continue reading “On Being Valued”
FOMA + BIPOLAR CHAT
It’s a beautiful, hot, sunny day here in west Wales. I’d like to be swimming in the sea today, I must admit. I live about twenty minutes away by bicycle, but don’t fancy a solo swim. Earlier today I actually had coffee with someone else: my ex. I saw him walking down the street andContinue reading “FOMA + BIPOLAR CHAT”
Freedoms
MORE ON LETTING GO I’m still struggling to get over my ex. I still scan the street for his car whenever I go out the front door. I used to see him all the time on the high street, when he lived in town. These sightings are less frequent now. But not seeing him doesContinue reading “Freedoms”
I AM A CLOUD: Thoughts From a Recovering Addict With Bipolar Disorder 